Qui est Le Chat Dangereux?

Well, first of all, Le Chat Dangereux is not of French descent, origin, or by any other means of French lineage. In fact, the only French influence that Le Chat Dangereux has acquired throughout her existence is that of her five years of attempting to learn the language and then proceed to fail miserably at keeping up with it. Her alias is a homage to her "French roots", so to say, and an attempt to give justification to the five wasted years of having learned nothing at all.¹

Le Chat Dangereux is not a daredevil in any aspect of her life, yet the same can't be said for her driving abilities.²

She does not have David Bowie eyes, although there are a few photographs out there that this statement can be argued with.³

She doesn't enjoy long walks on the beach unless it is during the hours of 12 a.m. to 3 in the morning, when the winds howl near the ocean and the sand doesn't feel as sticky as it should be.⁴

Le Chat Dangereux likes her fonts to be of 8 pt. size or smaller, yet realizes that this may be the reason that her vision is a -6.25 on both the left and right eyes.⁵

She is well aware of the close significance of her choice of alias. So to touch base on the matter, there will be no talk of pussies, dangerous or otherwise. 

She is not a virgin, so there might be talk of pussies, dangerous or otherwise.⁶

Le Chat Dangereux is currently available and feels that the opposite sex should have the same sentiments as her confidantes have; that she is an awesome person who deserves to have someone give it to her right every night.⁷

She isn't the prettiest girl in the world, nor the ugliest. She just has this face, that comes with a pair of lips, one nose, and two eyes. Along with this face comes a set of ears attached to the sides, hair that extends down to the tip of her shoulders, dyed half in blue (currently), and a smile that could still your beating heart.⁸

She enjoys viewing moments in life as if they all deserved their own cinematic exposure and feels that life would look much more attractive if there was an option of movement in slow motion.⁹

She is a friend, although she doesn't have many; a lover, although she currently doesn't have anyone to love; a fighter, mentally she's fought the world; and a mother, in terms of "one badass motherfucker."

Qui est Le Chat Dangereux?

Elle est moi.

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¹ If asked, she attributes this to it not being her fault, but that of her instructors who didn't teach her how to completely express herself in this romance language using social situations. Instead, they taught her how to write it. So basically, don't expect Le Chat to come up to you speaking in fluent French, but do acknowledge the fact that she can write the hell out of it in letter form.

² Drivers who see pedestrians as points should not be allowed on the road, unless they are contributing to the overall evolution of mankind by weeding out the bad ones.

³ She enjoys and is amused by this little tidbit very much.

⁴ She hates sand. It's a passionate argument and I wouldn't bring it up if I were you. 

⁵ Vision is worsening as we speak. 

⁶ In terms of relationships and sexual encounters/escapades or phrases, Le Chat Dangereux is, for a lack of better words, very heated in her discussions of the opposite sex. In other words, she has no boundaries. For instance, ass-raped: how she feels on a daily basis when automobiles drive too close to her car from behind.

⁷ Although every night may seem excessive, this is the current frequency in which Dangereux feels she should be pleasured to.

⁸ Smile could be a mechanism of attack, so be mindful. 

⁹ Although this notion could potentially ruin time as we know it, at least time would look good being ruined.